5.10.10

surviving

Today is the second day of the second week where Michael is in Phoenix Monday through Friday. While I could easily complain about this terrible injustice I am going to try not to. Well not exactly.

This experience has left me to realize some things. Often I find myself surviving through the days. I have an attitude of "just make it through" instead of "stop and smell the roses" and that is sad. I do have plenty of moments everyday where I inhale deeply and smile at the beautiful simple life that I have. I just find it sad that my natural instinct when things get a little uncomfortable, messy or tired is to default to just surviving. Shouldn't I default to "how to remedy the situation and make it better for everyone?" Shouldn't I focus more on how to bail us out of the crap storm and onto higher ground? I think it seems ridiculous to just weather the storm. I really do. Because if I just weather the storm, most of my days will seem mostly stormy.

I am now, here and now, vowing to learn to change my situation for the better. Instead of tuning out via Facebook while the kids go crazy, instead of turning on a movie to quiet them, instead of gritting my teeth and holding my breath till Michael gets home, I'm going to find real solutions to the daily problems. I'm going to enjoy the days by finding answers to the fussiness and the boredom. I can't blame everything on everyone else ie: Michael being gone, the kids being tired, the weather being bad or a lack of money. So I'm going to stop doing that and start doing this. I'm gonna fix and adapt and entertain and play and laugh and smile and smell the roses.

7 comments:

Cariann said...

I don't think I could have said it better myself. Jeff hasn't been out of town for a few months now but I still find myself just holding on until Jeff comes home and takes over. We should start doing a play date or something. I am sure Devon would love playing with your kids!

Margaret Vance said...

WELL SAID! I have to admit that I do the same thing and that I've come to that same conclusion... "WORD" to every bit of what you said :)!

Heather B said...

A few months ago I realized that I've been in "Survival" mode for the last two years (since Annie was born.) And I think it's time to get out of it and pull it all together. So I'm working on this too.

becca olsen said...

I feel the same way! I figure I should really try to get a grip on things now, before I have 2 kiddo's! It's so easy to just make excuses, like oh i work full time and I'm pregnant, but really Bentley is growing up way to fast and I need to CHERISH my time with him! Thanks kat! By the way, I miss you like crazy!!!

Amy said...

Good for you! that is a great goal! I think we wall feel that way, just yesterday for example I did nothing all day because we are all sick. And today I have SOOO much to do and I found myself being like CRAP I need to get some stuff done, poor me. Then I was like wait no lets make it fun, so we did.

Jessie Eyre said...

First off, you're doing so great, it kills me. You are so amazing.

Secondly, you look incredible. You're so amazing.

And Thirdly, your kids are so stinkin' cute, they amaze me.

And I was JUST talking to a friend about how expensive balloons are these days. Seriously. That amazes me.

:)

Jene and Megan said...

We've all been there...I'm there on a very frequent basis! I like that you are honest and not full of "fluff" on your blog. It's real life and people can relate to you! Props for showing the good, the bad and the ugly...(not ugly but I had to finish the saying.) =)