I know that this may be a terribly boring post to many of you but it's high time I post one of those. I promise to get pictures and video of Jack's birthday up soon but for now I want to say some stuff.
I am really freaking tired. That said, I am also happy. Things are up and down lately. Violet was diagnosed with acid reflux and was put on Zantac last week. Since that did little to no good she started Prevacid today which is a little bit stronger. So fingers crossed that we will get some sleep and that our eardrums will get a break from the screaming. I also hope that she starts to feel less pain. Really, no 6 week old should feel pain, it's just cruel.
So now that that is off my chest let me tell you a little something else that is buggy. My diet. I can't eat anything! Let me rephrase that, I can only eat a few things. No dairy whatsoever, no soda whatsoever, no artificial sweetener, very few veggies, very few fruits, nothing sour, spicy or overly seasoned and no chocolate of course. Anything too fibrous and we have to squeeze toots out of the little gal for hours by squishing her knees to her chest. Sometimes they are real rippers that make us laugh but it's still annoying. I feel very limited and frustrated. Not just because I can't eat what I want but because I really really really need some fiber ya'll. If you know what I'm saying. If you don't know, don't worry. So these diet limitations coupled with my personal diet limitations for weight loss are really putting a damper on my meals. And if you know me, you know I really like to eat and am basically an emotional eater. This is like emotional eater rehab in it's most brutal form, cold turkey style. No exhaustion healed by Girhadelli brownies and no nervous breakdowns prevented by fast food. Bummer. Not even a strawberry smoothie splurge to cheer me up. The doctor said that if it doesn't get better in three to four days to call him and we'll discuss switching to formula. I really don't want to go that route for a few reasons but we can discuss that if it happens.
What else. I am finally going back to the gym full force this week. Violet is six weeks tomorrow and I am stoked. I am actually subbing a class this Thursday night at 5:30 if any of you Tucson gals want to come. It will be a blast. Honestly though, I am a little nervous. Teaching a full BodyStep class is a difficult task when you are in good shape. I just hope my 6 weeks post delivery body will afford me the energy to get through it. Cross your fingers that I actually get some sleep on Wednesday night so I even have a flying chance of success. Thanks.
Not much else is new. Well, actually there is the potential of alot being really new and exciting but I don't want to jinx it so I am staying quite.
I have been thinking alot lately about cleanliness. I am usually the kind of girl that frantically cleans before anyone comes over but I had an interesting experience a couple of weeks ago that has changed my mind. I went to a friends house for a little play date with Jack and her son. When we walked in her house felt instantly comfortable. It was clean but there were a few dishes in the sink and she was in her comfy pants. I felt soooo welcome. Isn't that weird? A few dishes in the sink and a pair of sweat pants put me more at ease than I could have imagined. I realized that by me trying to scrub and sweep up every dirty particle in my house before someone comes over I might be sending the wrong message. Who cares if there are toys strewn all over or if my kitchen table is covered in folded clothes waiting to be put away? I shouldn't stress over this crap because there is a chance that I might be doing the opposite of what I intend to do which is make people feel welcome. I have resigned to stay calm about the crap the next time someone comes over. It is a good resolution.
Also, I made another decision. No shopping until I can fit into my old clothes. I have only a handful of outfits to wear and it's annoying but I don't want to spend money on clothes that will be too big soon. So, if you see me a few days in a row wearing the same jeans, don't judge. I only have one pair that don't muffin top me and since I only have 8 pounds left to go I think I can hang on.
Ah. This post feels strangely good. I guess because it's all about me, well mostly, and it's also about nothing. Sometimes I just need to ramble and let it all come out.